After you’ve been together long enough, you know exactly how to push your significant other’s buttons.
Now, being a legitimate jerk to your partner is not cool under any circumstances. But a little playful button-pushing here and there? All in good fun. On Wednesday, a Reddit thread popped up asking, ‘What’s your favorite way to annoy your significant other?” We put that question to our readers and compiled the best responses from both forums below:
1. “She’s short, I’m tall. Her things tend to move to the top shelf.”
via The Daily Edge
2. “My fiancé hates my cold feet when we get in bed at night. My favorite thing is to creep up and touch him with them when he least expects it.”
3. “I try to put my finger in her nose. I’m 30.”
4. “I like to yell, ‘OH SH*T, F**K, BABE! OH GOD’ and he gets all panicked like, ‘What?! What’s wrong?!’ and I go, ‘I need kisses, stat!’ His sigh of frustrated relief amuses me.”
5. “I cover up my teeth with my lips then gnaw on him saying it’s what it would feel like if I was a turtle and I bit him.”
6. “My husband just comes up behind me and starts groping my butt like, ‘Oh, excuse me. Oh, sorry, didn’t see you there. Oh gosh, I’m so clumsy.'”
7. “By mispronouncing common words on purpose. Saying ‘wallet’ but rhyming it with ‘ballet’, or saying ‘page’ but rhyming it with Fage yogurt. She hates that.”
8. “I anticipate where she’s going to be and stand perfectly still until she turns around, and I’m 5 inches from her face.”
9. “I ask her hypothetical questions about our cat. Today’s question was: ‘If Noodles was the U.S. poet laureate, where would she draw her inspiration from? What would she write about?'”
10. “My wife holds a master’s degree in English. When I use certain words, I ask her, ‘Do you know what that means?’“
11. “I carpet his whole bathroom in ‘Frozen’ decals overnight (we are gay men, have two bathrooms, he has to get up very early so he uses the other bathroom to get ready). I always hear a loud ‘WHAT THE F**K’ in the morning.”
12. “I use gross terminology for sex and related terms. Last night I called semen ‘testicular tartar sauce.’ She was not amused.”
13. “I tickle his feet in the morning since I have to be up and he doesn’t. Cracks me up! He hates it.”
14. “Getting into bed with my socks on, then taking them off and pushing them over to his side.”
15. When I watch reality shows like ‘The Bachelor’ or ‘Real Housewives’ and make him watch it with me.”
16. “I call him ‘hanny’ as in ‘handsome.’ Like, ‘You look so hanny today babe!’ He will laugh and say, ‘That’s not even a word!'”
17. “Whenever my wife is about to sit down, I put my hand on her seat. I did it once back when we were in the early stages of dating to straight-up cop a feel. She mentioned to me months later that I had never tried it again. As soon as she said that, this habit started. She’s been rolling her eyes on the daily for seven years.”
*Some responses have been edited or condensed.
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