Punnies

I couldn’t sleep the night Vista was released: There were windows crashing everywhere.

“On the first day of my new afternoon show, I couldn’t wait to see who our first sponsor was. It turned out to be a well-known laxative. I eagerly,
said, ‘Well.., we’re off and running.'” (Merv Griffen)

A 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a
year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles per gallon.

A statistician can have his head in an oven and his feet in ice, and he will say that on the average he feels fine.

Received from Stan Kegel.
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