Vegas sports royalty welcomes the Raiders with open arms

The Silver & Black and Sin City seem like an ideal match, as Vegas sports icons past and present are ecstatic about having the Raiders. – NFL

Ivy League rules out playing all sports this fall

The Ivy League on Wednesday became the first Division I conference to say it will not hold sports this fall amid the coronavirus pandemic. – TOP

LaMelo, Lonzo And LiAngelo Ball to Sign With Jay-Z’s Roc Nation Sports

The Ball Brothers are joining a new family — the Roc Nation Sports fam — with LaMelo, Lonzo AND LiAngelo Ball all planning to sign with Jay-Z’s sports management company. Melo’s business partner, Jermaine Jackson, went public with the decision on…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Vin + Omi Work With Team GB Athletes on Recycled Sports Clothing

GOOD SPORTS: The British label Vin + Omi has another eco-minded collection in the pipeline. For fall 2020 the designers have allied themselves with Team GB Olympians and are whipping the athletes’ unused clothing and equipment from sponsors into runway-ready punk pieces.
Omi described the fall 2020 show, which takes place at The Savoy hotel on Feb. 14, as its “largest, most recycled” yet. Team GB sailor Hannah Mills and fencer James Honeybone, who walked in Vin + Omi’s spring/summer 2020 show, contributed their unused pieces.
“We utilized every single bit of a fencing kit — from the blades, to the sabre, to the masks. Everything was chucked into” an entire look, said Omi.
Other highlights include a coat that was made by hand from a sail, as well as a jacket sporting all the Team GB sponsors’ logos jumbled together.
“The pieces are designed to be slightly unwearable to show the awkwardness of the sport being bastardized by advertising,” Omi added. “It’s amazing to see how much branding one sport has at one event.”
For 16 years, the London-based designers have been attempting to push the limit of sustainable clothing production and have dressed celebrities including Beyoncé and Michelle Obama. They also work with private

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Kelly Rowland Proudly Sports Beyonce’s New Adidas x Ivy Park Gear

Kelly Rowland’s going full Beyonce … with her new wardrobe. The Destiny’s Child singer showed some serious love to her BFF Thursday by going out in Brentwood covered head to toe in Bey’s new Adidas x Ivy Park activewear collection. You gotta…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Lori Loughlin, Mossimo Giannulli Wrote Check to USC, So Sports Dept. Could ‘Feed the Beast’

Lori Loughlin and husband Mossimo Giannulli have a secret weapon in their college admissions criminal case — the former head of the USC athletics department, who made it clear during his tenure — the school gave him a clear directive to raise…


TMZ Celebrity News for Celebrity Justice

Kate Spade Enters Sports Smartwatch Market

Kate Spade is expanding its watch line — tapping into a strong market for athletic devices.
Today the brand launches its first sports smartwatch, created in partnership with its watch licensee Fossil. Priced at $ 275 retail, the timepieces offer heart-rate tracking, untethered GPS and Google Pay as well as weather, music and training apps.

Kate Spade’s sports smartwatch. 

The style breaks with sports smartwatch convention — particularly the Apple Watch — in that it purposely features feminine design details. The watch is offered in all-pink or pink-accented color ways and features a scalloped dial.
Kate Spade’s creative director Nicola Glass said of the watch release: “Our customer is adventurous — she loves all kinds of activities, and is always looking for accessories that fit into her everyday life. We’ve incorporated some of our most iconic design elements, including the spade and scallop detailing, to give the watch a distinct Kate Spade New York look and feel, while the silicone strap and lightweight design gives her the functionality she needs without sacrificing style.”

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Babe Ruth baseball jersey tops rare sports memorabilia sale

The 1938 coaching uniform could reach half a million dollars at auction this November, while a Marilyn Monroe-Joe DiMaggio signed baseball may fetch over $ 200,000. Rough cut (no reporter narration).

Reuters Video: Entertainment

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Sports Bras Are Taking Over Women’s Lingerie Collections

Sports bras are winning the lingerie race. 
Somewhere between the casualization of American fashion and the desire for comfort, sports bras have become one of the preferred bra options. In fact, in the roughly $ 12 billion to $ 13 billion North American intimates apparel market, the most growth in the last three years has been in sports bras and shapewear, according to the NPD Group. 
That could explain the rise of shapewear brands, including Commando and Kim Kardashian’s new shapewear line, along with the surge in popularity of things like bodysuits. Among the sports bra category, sales in the U.S. rose 6 percent for the 12 months ending May 2019, according to the NPD Group’s Consumer Tracking Service.

An Aerie sports bra. 

The research firm also found that Millennials alone⁠ — the cohort that currently captures the biggest chunk of the women’s intimates apparel market⁠ — spent about a third of their bra budgets on sports bras in 2018. Those numbers are expected to grow as Millennials and the generation behind them continue to age, spend more money and seek comfort. But it’s not just young people that want to feel unencumbered. 
“Women of all ages are finding sports bras more comfortable and a more fitting

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Raiders WR Antonio Brown’s frostbite joins list of most bizarre recent sports injuries

Antonio Brown has missed part of Raiders training camp due to a bizarre frostbite injury … which got us thinking about some other weird ways athletes have gotten hurt. – NHL

Fila to Introduce Explore Collection, Blending Sports and Style

Fila is heading to the mountains, the woods and the canyons for its newest collection. The company has created Explore, a limited-edition assortment of footwear, apparel and accessories for men and women that will have a soft launch at ComplexCon in Chicago this weekend.
To support the launch, Fila will open experiential pop-up stores in SoHo in New York, in Los Angeles and in several other cities around the world on July 26.
The genesis of the collection dates to 1978 when mountaineer, adventurer and explorer Reinhold Messner was the first to summit Mount Everest without the aid of supplemental oxygen dressed in high-tech Fila gear.
While Explore is inspired by this feat and the brand’s outdoor heritage in skiing, hiking and trekking, the collection is “not so literal, but is more fashion-driven,” according to Louis W. Colon 3rd, Fila North America’s vice president of heritage and trend. So it’s better suited to hanging out at a festival than hiking the Appalachian Trail.
He said many customers still think of Fila as a tennis or basketball brand, but it has a rich history in other outdoor sports as well and the new collection is intended “to get customers to explore the brand more. There are tons

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Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Models Flock to Miami for Swim Week

Rob Gronkowski’s girlfriend, Camille Kostek, is this year’s ‘Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Edition’ cover girl, but when her fellow models show up to flaunt their stuff … we all win. Camille led the pack Sunday in Miami, where she strutted down…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Barstool Sports Sued Over Famous Sad Roger Goodell Image

TMZ Sports spoke with Barstool president Dave Portnoy … who says he has email conversations with the designers that prove they were more than okay with Barstool buying the image for $ 300 back in 2015. “We’ve spoke with these guys a lot during the…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Who was your sports hero? NFL stars talk Jordan, Ali and more

As the 2019 ESPYS approach, we asked players around the league to tell us about their childhood sports heroes. – NFL

Wolf: A Sports Romance – Lisa Lang Blakeney

Lisa Lang Blakeney - Wolf: A Sports Romance  artwork

Wolf: A Sports Romance

Lisa Lang Blakeney

Genre: Romance

Price: $ 9.99

Publish Date: April 30, 2019

© ℗ © 2019 Tantor Audio

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Episode 519 Scott Adams: 85% of CNN’s Political Coverage, Deserving Sports


  • 85% of CNN’s POLITICAL coverage…is fake news and hoaxes
    • Red-pilling statistic challengers with the “fine people” HOAX
  • Somebody should create a fact check list of CNN lies?
  • Quillette’s Claire Lehmann tweet about trans athletes
  • De-escalating fears of Chernobyl type nuclear disasters
    • Chernobyl, Gen 1 safety systems, primitive 1960s era
    • Gen 3 nuclear designs are safer by design and time proven
    • Gen 4 nuclear designs have even safer concepts
  • 430 rockets fired from Gaza into Israel
    • Israel in response, “mowed the lawn”
  • Demands to jail AG Barr…because CNN can’t read
  • Was it an organized coup plot to take out President Trump?
    • Lots of questions for top people like Brennan and Clapper
    • How much did Obama know, and when did he know it?
  • Biden’s election chances are…zero?
    • He doesn’t have a natural group of locked in voters
    • Kamala would attract woman and black voters
    • Buttigieg would attract gay voters
    • Biden is just a weak version of President Trump

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The post Episode 519 Scott Adams: 85% of CNN’s Political Coverage, Deserving Sports appeared first on Dilbert Blog.

Dilbert Blog

Episode 444 Scott Adams: Sports Are Broken, Trump’s Best Week Ever, Moderate Bernie


  • “Old Nads” document blizzard request to 81 people
    • Even the Democrats know this is way beyond legitimate
    • Michael Caputo’s refusal to comply, all should follow his lead
  • Cognitive Dissonance Tell – Word Salad
    • Example: David Pakman and the “Fine People Hoax”
  • Fine People Hoax – President Trump called people on both sides of the STATUE question “fine people”.
    • Trying to deprogram people who believe the “Fine People Hoax”
  • North Korea might be fixing up a worrisome facility, negotiating 101
  • Bernie proposals now seem moderate in comparison to others
  • Capitalism delivers what socialism promises
  • Sports and trans-athletes competing, winning
    • Performance enhancing drugs
  • Jim Carrey’s artwork and artistic talent

I fund my Periscopes and podcasts via audience micro-donations on Patreon. I prefer this method over accepting advertisements or working for a “boss” somewhere because it keeps my voice independent. No one owns me, and that is rare. I’m trying in my own way to make the world a better place, and your contributions help me stay inspired to do that.

See all of my Periscope videos here.

Find my WhenHub Interface app here.

The post Episode 444 Scott Adams: Sports Are Broken, Trump’s Best Week Ever, Moderate Bernie appeared first on Dilbert Blog.

Dilbert Blog

Is the NHL the future of marijuana in pro sports? Why it could be

Of the 123 major sports teams, 82 percent play in areas where it’s legal to purchase medicinal or recreational marijuana. The NHL has noticed. Who’s next? – NHL

It’s time to appreciate this Patriots dynasty as the greatest in sports

You might not like it, but you’re watching the greatest dynasty in sports history. And it’s time to appreciate it, whether or not you root for the Pats. – TOP

Barstool Sports Countersues Michael Rapaport for $400k, Defends Herpes Remarks

Michael Rapaport has no business suing anyone for saying he has herpes … because he himself has said it … according to the countersuit Barstool Sports just filed against the actor. Barstool is firing back at Rapaport’s September lawsuit against them,…


TMZ Celebrity News for Celebrity Justice

EA Sports Announces ‘FIFA 19’ World Tour ft. Stormzy, A$AP Rocky, Odell Beckham Jr. & More

EA SPORTS FIFA 19 “World Tour”

Source: EA Sports / EA Sports

EA Sports is bringing the most prominent names sports and music together with the FIFA 19 World Tour to take on each other in its uber-popular soccer video game franchise FIFA 19

Today the video game company kicked off the FIFA 19 World Tour with the help of Manchester United’s Marcus Rashford and Jesse Lingard, Grime artist Stormzy and comedian, rapper and actor Michael Dapaah aka Big Shaq. The first stop on tour takes us across the pond to London where we see the four take on each other in a no rules game of FIFA 19’s Kick Off mode.

Following London, EA will take the electronic version of The World’s Game to these other stops around the globe featuring these big names:

  • Odell Beckham Jr vs. A$ AP Rocky in New York City
  • Maluma vs. Martin Garrix in Rio, Brazil
  • Kimpembe, Meunier, Niska, Alonso in Paris
  • Liam Payne, Christian Pulisic, Marco Reus and more in Dortmund

For the first installment, Stormzy who has bragged about his FIFA skills was definitely getting the side-eye from the “Mans Not Hot” creator Big Shaq cause they definitely got their tails handed to them. In their defense, though they did take on two professional soccer players, so it’s quite understandable why they caught an L.

Regardless the match made for some hilarious banter between them we are looking forward to the other videos from the other tour stops. You can watch Stormzy, and Big Shaq gets schooled in FIFA 19 below.

Photo: EA Sports

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Adidas reinvents Original Six jerseys in EA Sports’ ‘NHL 19’

The Rangers, Blackhawks, Red Wings, Bruins, Maple Leafs and Canadiens each have new looks — or at least they do in video game form. – NHL

Ice Cube Part Of Investment Group To Buy 22 Sports TV Stations

The West Coast Rap All Stars Show was held in Planet Hollywood Casino Hotel in Las Vegas

Source: / WENN

Ice Cube has long established himself in other areas outside the medium of music and acting, and now he’s hoping to get into the sports television business too. The rapper and actor is part of an investment group that is hoping to purchase 22 regional sports stations.

The Blast reports:

According to our sources, the legendary rapper is joining forces with Carolyn Rafaelian, the founder of popular bangle brand Alex and Ani, in a bid to buy 22 regional sports television stations.

Sources close to the deal tell The Blast that Rafaelian “is going in huge on this” with Ice Cube and will be investing heavily in the deal.

Rafaelian, based on the success of the Alex and Ani brand, is #21 on the Forbes list of America’s Richest Self-Made Women. She was also named “America’s richest jeweler.” She was also named one of People Magazine’s “25 Woman Changing the World.”

Cube is also being joined by his partners in the Big3 basketball league in making the bid.

According to the Wall Street Journal and also mentioned by the outlet, the stations are valued at $ 25 billion. Disney has to let the stations go as part of their deal to acquire 21st Century Fox.

Photo: WENN

The Latest Hip-Hop News, Music and Media | Hip-Hop Wired

The most devastating quarter in sports

You’ve feared them. You’ve been in awe of them. Now we break down the Warriors’ video-game third quarters, when all opponents can do is pray for a merciful end. – NBA

Barnwell: Ultimate surprise sports runs — where Vegas ranks

Does Vegas’ Stanley Cup run make it the most unlikely finalist in modern American sports? Bill Barnwell looks at candidates across the big four. – NHL

Osama bin Laden Killer Robert O’Neill Sports a Rambo Shirt

John Rambo, meet the guy who killed Osama bin Laden — now play nice.  Ex-U.S. Navy Seal Robert O’Neill posted a photo Saturday of himself wearing a shirt from Sylvester Stallone’s clothing store — the Sly Stallone Shop – featuring one of…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Eric Dane Sports New Blonde Hairdo in Wake of Divorce Filing with Rebecca Gayheart

Eric Dane might be having a major blonde moment in the wake of him and his wife filing for divorce — that, or he’s just really feeling himself … we’re not sure.  The “Grey’s Anatomy” star was spotted rockin’ a brand new ‘do Tuesday in WeHo…


TMZ Celebrity News for Fashion

Danielle Herrington: Meet The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue’s New Cover Model!

Danielle Herrington is the 2018 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model! Get to know the up-and-coming star and hear how excited she was when she heard the news about her huge gig. See more at The issue is on newsstands now.

Access Hollywood Latest Videos

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Model Danielle Herrington: 5 Need To Know Facts!

Danielle Herrington just landed the 2018 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover! 

Access Hollywood Latest News

Sailor Brinkley Cook Wows In Sparkling Gold Bikini For 2018 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue

Access Hollywood Latest News

Kerr on being fastest in American sports to 250 wins: “I inherited a hell of a team”

Golden State’s victory over the visiting San Antonio Spurs gave Warriors head coach Steve Kerr 250 wins, but he’s deferring to the collection of greatness around him. – TOP

Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life (Unabridged) – Mike Golic & Mike Greenberg

Mike Golic & Mike Greenberg - Mike and Mike's Rules for Sports and Life (Unabridged)  artwork

Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life (Unabridged)

Mike Golic & Mike Greenberg

Genre: Comedy

Price: $ 15.95

Publish Date: April 6, 2010

© ℗ © 2010 Oasis Audio

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Hugh Jackman Introduces ‘Greatest Showman’ Singer at Party for Sports and Entertainment Stars

[[tmz:video id=”0_95mxyj6q”]] Hugh Jackman, a bunch of movie stars, and past and present Olympians were treated to an early ‘Golden Globes’ preview … a live performance of “This is Me.” Jackman gave an impassioned speech about women in sports and…


TMZ Celebrity News for Music

Beyoncé Surprises Colin Kaepernick With The Sports Illustrated Muhammad Ali Legacy Award

Beyoncé made a rare surprise
appearance at the 2017 Sportsperson of the Year Award
Show in New York to present Colin Kaepernick with Sports Illustrated’s
Muhammed Ali Legacy Award.

Access Hollywood Latest News

Beyoncé Surprises Colin Kaepernick With Sports Illustrated’s Muhammad Ali Legacy Award

Beyonce, Colin KaepernickBeyoncé is showing her support for Colin Kaepernick.
In a surprise appearance few people knew about in advance, the “Crazy in Love” singer stepped out Tuesday night to…

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Songs We Love: Sports, ‘Making It Right’


If you thought All Of Something signaled the end of Sports (the band), then surprise! The high-energy breakup song “Making It Right” appears on a split 7″ with sob rockers Plush.

(Image credit: Jess Flynn/Courtesy of the artist)

Rock : NPR


Sports Illustrated Debuts Its Epic Line Of Extended Size Swimsuits

Yes, S.I. is making a splash in the design biz.
Fashion News, Celebrity Style and Fashion Trends – HuffPost Style
FASHION NEWS UPDATE-Visit Shoe Deals Online today for the hottest deals online for shoes!

Watch Out, Michael Phelps! Russell Wilson Can’t Wait to Slime You at the 2017 Kids’ Choice Sports Awards

Russell Wilson, Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Sports AwardsNo matter how much they train, nothing can prepare the biggest athletes for a little thing called slime.
We’re just days away from the 2017 Kids’ Choice Sports Awards where…

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Sports News in Brief: Bulls Players Annoyed By Derrick Rose Always Leaving Torn Ligaments All Over Locker Room

CHICAGO—Calling it “disrespectful” and “totally disgusting,” members of the Chicago Bulls expressed their frustration to reporters Wednesday over point guard Derrick Rose’s habit of always leaving his torn ligaments strewn all over their locker room. “Every time I walk in here after practice or a game, I see Derrick’s shredded MCLs and ACLs just lying on the floor, and it’s ridiculous,” said small forward Jimmy Butler, who added that he and his teammates have repeatedly implored Rose to clean up the wet, tattered bands of connective tissue that he regularly leaves sitting in puddles of synovial fluid around nearby lockers. “Not only is it gross, but yesterday Pau [Gasol] threw out one that he almost slipped on in the bathroom. They’re Derrick’s ligaments, so we shouldn’t have to pick up after him like this. We’re sick of it.” Butler added that he …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Roger Goodell Quietly Says Goodnight To Hallway Of NFL Greats’ Chemically Preserved Bodies

NEW YORK—Slowly walking down the basement hallway as the ceiling’s fluorescent lights turned off row by row behind him, Roger Goodell quietly said goodnight to each of the legendary former NFL players whose bodies he had chemically preserved, sources confirmed late Wednesday evening. “Sleep well, my friends,” whispered Goodell, delicately placing a hand against the glass of a tank containing the corpse of Johnny Unitas perfectly embalmed in a green, viscous liquid, before then waving to the floating bodies of Walter Payton, Reggie White, and the entire 1949 NFL Championship–winning Philadelphia Eagles defensive line housed in the back of the hall. “I’ll see you again in the morning. I love you.” Sources confirmed that before exiting the room, Goodell took one last look at the empty tank intended for Denver Broncos quarterback Peyton Manning, emitted a deep sigh, and then shut the door.

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Team Of Bikini-Clad Women Tend To Injured Dez Bryant In Cowboys’ Rehabilitation Grotto

DALLAS—Providing injured players with the very best in amenities, individualized training programs, and exotic Mediterranean fruits, a team of bikini-clad women tended to injured wide receiver Dez Bryant in the Dallas Cowboys’ state-of-the-art rehabilitation grotto, team sources confirmed Thursday. “This place is amazing—I’ve got access to top-of-the-line PT equipment, and I’ve been working really closely with Candi on plyometric strengthening exercises so I can get back on the field as quickly as possible,” said Bryant, sipping on a flute of champagne while several tanned, scantily dressed female trainers carefully stretched his hamstrings. “Lately, it’s just been Tony [Romo] and me swimming laps in the lily pond every morning, and I usually lie out on those sun-bathed limestone rocks and use the electrical muscle stimulation machine to recover after my workouts. Oh, and the private massage area behind the waterfall is really out of this world …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Gruesome, Deformed Jason Pierre-Paul Lurking In Sewers Beneath MetLife Stadium

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Quietly navigating through the damp, pitch-black tunnels underneath the 82,500-seat arena, gruesome, deformed New York Giants defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul was reportedly spotted Wednesday lurking in the sewers below MetLife Stadium. “They mustn’t see me—they mustn’t see me!” muttered Pierre-Paul, using his tattered Giants uniform and helmet to cover his scarred, disfigured body, with reports confirming that the grotesque sixth-year defensive lineman occasionally peeks through small cracks of concrete late in the fourth quarter when the stadium is mostly deserted. “I am a monster now, and I cannot go near the surface dwellers. The shadows…the shadows are my home.” At press time, Pierre-Paul was feasting on a bucket of raw fish left for him near a drainage grate by Giants head coach Tom Coughlin.

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Teammates Unnerved By Kris Bryant’s Repeated Attempts To Break Cubs’ Curse With Slaughtered Goats

CHICAGO—Describing the sickening sight and stench of the carcasses that have become a constant presence around the clubhouse, members of the Chicago Cubs admitted to reporters Tuesday that they have become increasingly unnerved by third baseman Kris Bryant’s repeated attempts to break the team’s so-called “Curse of the Billy Goat” by slaughtering goats. “I know he thinks he’s doing it all for the team, but his fixation with finding and killing all of these goats is starting to get out of control,” said first baseman Anthony Rizzo, adding that Bryant, who has killed an estimated 30 goats since the playoffs began, has disgusted teammates with rituals that include sprinkling powdered goat horn inside the batter’s box and storing severed goat heads in the dugout’s helmet rack. “It’s kind of scary how seriously he takes it, like the way he freaks out whenever he …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: WNBA MVP Devastated After Roommate Moves Out Without Any Warning

CHICAGO—Saying she is now desperately searching for any options that will prevent her from being evicted, Chicago Sky forward and 2015 WNBA MVP Elena Delle Donne was reportedly left scrambling Thursday after her roommate moved out of their apartment without any warning whatsoever. “I really don’t know what I’m going to do, because rent is due in two weeks and there’s no way I can cover her $ 700,” said Delle Donne, adding that, with her team commitments and offseason workout schedule, she barely has the time to interview anyone who may respond to the sublet listing she posted on Craigslist. “Not only am I out on her rent, but also her half of the internet and electricity bills. I might just have to move to a studio or someplace on the South Side, because there’s no way I’m asking my parents for money again …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Mark McGwire Confident He Could Still Disgrace Game At High Level Today

LOS ANGELES—Despite retiring from the sport 14 years ago, 52-year-old former All-Star hitter Mark McGwire confidently told reporters Friday that he could still disgrace baseball at the highest level today. “I might not be what I once was, but I could definitely get out there on the field and completely tarnish the reputation of the sport just like I used to,” said McGwire, adding that while he enjoys working as a hitting coach for the Dodgers, he is often nostalgic for the days when he would wake up every morning, lie to teammates and fans, and let down everyone connected to baseball. “I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t considered coming back for another season to destroy the legacy of an entire generation of players. Look, I’m confident in my abilities, and there’s no doubt in my mind that I could go out there …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Furious Rick Pitino Adamant Media Trying To Tarnish Name Of Great Escort Service

LOUISVILLE, KY—Following the publication of a book alleging that a member of the school’s basketball department paid women to perform sex acts for recruits, furious University of Louisville head coach Rick Pitino told reporters Wednesday that the media was trying to tarnish the name of a great escort service. “No one, I repeat no one, in the Cardinals community has anything but good things to say about these ladies, and it’s absolutely shameful to see their names get dragged through the mud,” said an enraged Pitino, blasting news outlets for maliciously attacking the reputation of a highly regarded, hardworking escort service. “To say I’m disgusted and disappointed with the way the press has recklessly tried to cast aspersions on this escort service would be an understatement. Say what you will about me, I’m the coach of this team, but I won’t stand for the …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Roger Goodell Unveils Plans For NFL Game In Earth’s Core

NEW YORK—Saying that it is the perfect way to further increase the sport’s popularity, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced Monday that the league will soon begin holding a regular-season game deep within the Earth’s inner core. “This game represents an opportunity to bring the great sport of football over 3,000 miles below Earth’s crust,” said Goodell, adding that the primetime event in the planet’s 10,800-degree, nickel-iron core will be scheduled as a regular-season matchup between two non-divisional opponents. “The league still has so much growth potential throughout the various interior layers of Earth, and a thrilling spectacle of world-class football will only continue to strengthen the NFL brand. And based on the research and various seismological studies that we’ve conducted over the past several years, we’re incredibly confident that the inner-core games will be a huge success.” At press time, sources …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Quarterback Better Snap The Ball, Reports Man Nervously Eyeing Play Clock

MANSFIELD, OH—Frantically shifting his gaze between the field and play clock as the seconds wound down, local 34-year-old football fan Isaac Collins announced Sunday that the quarterback better hurry the hell up and snap the ball. “C’mon, only eight seconds left—what are you waiting for?” said Collins, carefully eyeing the small play clock graphic in the corner of the screen as the quarterback ran up to the line of scrimmage to call an audible. “Go already! Go!” At press time, Collins had unleashed a stream of expletives after the quarterback finally snapped the ball to a flurry of whistles and penalty flags.

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Report: Peyton Manning Lacks Strength To Complete Longer Commercial Takes

DENVER—Noting that physical limitations were hindering the 39-year-old’s performance, league sources confirmed Thursday that Denver Broncos quarterback Peyton Manning lacks the strength to complete longer commercial takes. “Peyton’s preparation and ability to process information are second to none, but when you watch him struggling to complete longer scenes, it’s obvious that time is finally catching up to one of the all-time commercial greats,” said NFL media analyst Albert Breer, adding that it was hard to watch Manning rely on short, quick takes just to get through a single page of dialogue. “Unfortunately, this late in his career, Peyton’s lack of mobility has become much more apparent, and his range is fairly limited as the shoot wears on. It’s never been his strong suit, but now when Manning is forced to improvise his accuracy is just way off.” At press time, NFL analysts told reporters …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Dolphins Coaches Trying To Fix Ndamukong Suh’s Quarterback-Throwing Mechanics

MIAMI—With the star defensive tackle struggling considerably in the first two weeks of the season, Miami Dolphins coaches told reporters Wednesday that they have been working closely with Ndamukong Suh to fix his quarterback-throwing mechanics. “Watching tape of him the past couple weeks, we’ve noticed Ndamukong hasn’t had his usual strength and accuracy, so we’re working with him to get back to the fundamentals of throwing the quarterback,” said Dolphins defensive coordinator Kevin Coyle, adding that Suh has had trouble with his release, often using an elongated sidearm motion that causes him to badly underthrow the quarterback downward and into the ground. “One of the big things we’re focusing on is his footwork, which has been pretty sloppy. We need him firmly planting his feet so he can really step into the throw, which will help put a lot more zip and distance on the …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: New LSU Stadium Shuttle Transports Tigers Fans Back To Woods

BATON ROUGE, LA—Saying that they hope to make traveling to and from football games more convenient and enjoyable, officials from the LSU athletic department announced Friday that the university will now offer a round-trip stadium shuttle bus to transport Tigers fans back to the woods. “Beginning this Saturday, for just $ 2 a ticket, fans can use our new Tiger Bus to ride directly from the bushlands to the game and back,” said LSU spokesman Michael Bonnette, adding that, beginning six hours before kickoff, fans can catch the bus at any of the numerous stops it will make at various ravines, forest clearings, and swamps near Baton Rouge, while return trips to the remote wilderness will begin at the start of the game’s fourth quarter. “The Tiger Bus is the perfect way to skip the hassle of the parking lot, and helps ensure that all of our fans get …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Luke Kuechly Undergoes Quick Brain Arthroscopy To Clean Up Cerebral Cortex

CHARLOTTE, NC—After suffering a concussion that sidelined him against the Jacksonville Jaguars last weekend, the Carolina Panthers announced Thursday that All-Pro linebacker Luke Kuechly has undergone a quick brain arthroscopy in order to clean up his cerebral cortex. “Earlier today, we successfully scoped Luke’s brain and removed some buildup of tissue that had been accumulating in there,” said team doctor Donald Randolph, explaining that several small incisions were made in Kuechly’s forehead to allow surgeons to go into his cerebrum and remove loose tissue and bone fragments, as well as shave away the worn areas of his frontal and temporal lobes. “There was actually quite a bit of fluid inside Luke’s skull that had to be drained, and hopefully that will alleviate some discomfort. And as long as he continually ices it for the next 24 to 48 hours, the swelling in his head should be …

The Onion

Sports News: Giants Move Tom Coughlin To Assisted-Coaching Facility

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Saying that they held off taking such a drastic step for as long as they could, officials from the New York Giants confirmed Wednesday that the team had made the difficult decision to move head coach Tom Coughlin into an assisted-coaching facility. “We know Tom likes his independence, but ultimately we had no choice—at least this way he won’t have to completely stop what he loves doing while still getting the proper supervision and attention he needs,” said offensive coordinator Ben McAdoo, adding that he was hopeful the 69-year-old Coughlin would grow to appreciate the center’s many amenities, including trained staff on-site 24 hours per day ready to help residents read playbooks, review game film, and manage the clock during the fourth quarter. “We all knew this day would eventually come, and even though he was definitely a little hesitant about it, we think …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Area Dad Doesn’t Like Where Referee Spotted Football

ST. PAUL, MN—Complaining that the officials need to learn the damn rules, 44-year-old local dad Mark Bogdanski expressed both doubt and frustration Sunday over where the referee spotted the football. “They gave him a whole extra yard there—what are these refs even looking at?” said Bogdanski, adding that the referees are pretty much gifting the other team a first down with such a generous spot. “Don’t give me that bull about forward progress either, because his knee was down almost a full yard back. You have to challenge that call—that should be fourth down.” At press time, Bogdanski was angrily muttering under his breath after officials had upheld the ruling on the field upon reviewing the play.

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Tailgaters Playing Sad Little Game Of Pickup Football In Stadium Parking Lot

HOUSTON—Noting that the group has been constantly interrupted by cars slowly driving through searching for open spots, onlookers confirmed Saturday that several Texas A&M tailgaters outside NRG Stadium are playing a pathetic little game of pickup football in the parking lot. “Everyone’s just trying to walk to the game, but you have to pass this sideshow of these guys playing a mini–touch football game and then listen to one of them count down from five before blitzing the quarterback,” said 31-year-old Alex Bennett, adding that the seven middle-aged men—most of whom are wearing football jerseys and khaki shorts—are attempting to play a three-on-four game in the space between rows of parked cars. “They barely have enough room to play, so basically if they complete one pass, it’s a touchdown. And one of them accidentally hit the hood of a car with the football, which …

The Onion

Robert Griffin III — Fire Sale On Jerseys … At D.C. Sports Stores

File Under: “You Know It’s Over When …”  Check out the sale rack at City Sports in Washington D.C. — slashing prices on RG3 jerseys … days after he was benched in favor of Kirk Cousins.  We’re told the jerseys were originally on sale for…


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Sports News in Brief: Journeyman Fan Joins Sixth NFL Team In 5 Years

HELENA, MT—Continuing his lengthy trek around the league, sources confirmed Friday that 36-year-old journeyman fan Brian Ferretti has joined the Arizona Cardinals, his sixth team in the past five years. “Brian has really bounced around the NFL over the last decade, but I think he’s finally found the right fit with the Cards, and hopefully he’ll stay with them from here on out,” said coworker Tom Murray, adding that Ferretti’s recent teams include the San Francisco 49ers, Denver Broncos, New York Giants, Baltimore Ravens, and most recently the Seattle Seahawks, who he joined right before the 2013 playoffs. “I think he saw the potential of the Cardinals offense this year under a healthy Carson Palmer and decided they were the right team for him. That said, he’s moved a lot from team to team—I mean, he started out with the Cowboys in the ’90s …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Majority Of NFL Players Say They Wouldn’t Let Their Son Play Preseason Football

NEW YORK—As concerns about the health risks involved for youth players continue to rise, a new poll revealed Thursday that a growing majority of NFL players would not allow their sons to play preseason football. “Now that we know how dangerous it really is, how could I in good conscience let my 7-year-old son go out there and play in a preseason football game?” said Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker Lawrence Timmons, echoing the sentiments of many NFL players who told reporters that the potentially devastating health costs associated with participating in a full four-game preseason outweigh any reward, especially at the professional level. “The fact of the matter is that we just didn’t understand the full risks of preseason football back when I first started playing. I love this sport, but I’m not going to let my child put his long-term health on the line just to play …

The Onion

Pro Athletes Are the New Models: How Sports Stars Are Taking Over

Ana Ivanovic

There has never been a chicer time to be a sports fan. Athletes sit front row during Fashion Week, appear on the covers of the most influential magazines, express their personal style like never before on red carpets and street style blogs—and the rise of the fashion-plate athlete has provided the modeling industry with a unique opportunity. With their sculpted physiques and built-in fan bases, athletes offer a cachet that few models outside of industry superstars with occasional reality TV–enhanced audiences like Gigi Hadid and Kendall Jenner can match. While fitness-focused brands have always looked to athletes as representatives—Michael Jordan’s mutually beneficial relationship with Nike has now exceeded three decades—increased demand has led to sports stars collaborating with a wider range of brands. From Russell Westbrook’s capsule collections for Barneys New York to Rafael Nadal posing for Emporio Armani, the fashion potential of sports stars is seemingly infinite.

One man looking to bridge the gap between fashion and sports is Angus Munro. As the longtime casting director for shows like Rick Owens and Ann Demeulemeester, Munro helped to usher in an edgy aesthetic on the runways, and with his latest venture, P1 Management, he aims to revamp the entire modeling industry. Dedicated to harnessing the fashion power of sports figures, P1’s photogenic roster includes tennis ace Ana Ivanovic, Olympic gold medalist Anna Fenninger, and Real Madrid’s James Rodríguez. Though weeks away from launching P1, Munro has big plans for the company’s future. Find out how he translated his sports-nerd past into a full-fledged agency, and why he feels that athletes can bring something fresh to the industry.

What can an athlete bring to the table that a traditional model cannot?
With my other company, AM Casting, I believe we have been at the forefront of street and real-people casting in our work with, say, Uniqlo, Diesel, i-D, and Rick Owens. This is a trend that shows no sign of abating. I think consumers respond to aspirational characters who are not just aspirational because of their looks. I just always think to myself, “What is more inspiring and aspirational than someone who has dedicated their life to becoming one of the best in the world . . . Oh, and who is also really good-looking!” Therefore, one of my athletes in a campaign can bring a whole new dimension to that ad, and perhaps a whole new audience to the brand.

Why do you think so many athletes are interested in fashion right now?
I think athletes, just like other non-fashion people, have been becoming more and more dialed into what is happening in the fashion business. . . .  This is largely due to social media and the Internet as a whole. And as a result of this, the aspirational industries of music, sports, and fashion are cross-pollinating more and more—look at A$ AP [Rocky], Kanye, et cetera. Bearing this in mind, it is a surprise to me that we are really the first dedicated “model” agency for sports stars.

How did the idea for P1 become a reality?
I’m a sports nerd—really, I am! I spend the majority of my free time playing or watching sports, but the fashion industry is my life and has been incredibly good to me. And I had been trying since the mid-nineties to find a way to interface sports and fashion. The problem was that the world of fashion saw sports stars as a little “cheesy” (for want of a better word), and sport, in general, was not considered cool. But I really couldn’t shake the feeling that this was a matter of perception and that such perception would change . . . and change it duly did. I also needed to do this with partners who not only could bring different skills and backgrounds to the table, but who also really got my vision for this project.

Who are some of the athletes you will be launching with?
P1 Management has some incredible talent already who are as excited about this unique agency as we are. To name but a few, we are launching with Ana Ivanovic (world tennis no. seven), James Rodríguez (Real Madrid and Colombia, World Cup 2014 Golden Boot), Anna Fenninger (Olympic gold in skiing), Alexander Rossi (currently second in GP2 Series, the feeder championship to Formula 1), Alizé Lim (world tennis no. 182). We also have Dan Biggar, Leigh Halfpenny, George North, and Owen Farrell, who will all be competing in the Rugby World Cup in September. Danny Amendola, the New England Patriots’s wide receiver, leads our line in American sports at the moment. But we will be announcing some more exciting names very soon—watch this space.

What are the types of campaigns or brand partnerships you see these athletes getting?
We are getting an overwhelming reaction already, and we are still two weeks away from our official launch! Thus far, it is pretty much exactly as we had envisaged: Interest is coming from all areas of the business, from high fashion to mainstream beauty and lifestyle brands. Personally, I would love to do something like an Abercrombie or Gap campaign with all my athletes together.

Who would be your dream athlete to work with?
Any player (handsome or not) from my football team, Queens Park Rangers!

Ahem. Sorry. Seriously now, there are a few, actually, but I can’t mention names, as we are in discussions with them already! Probably the best way to answer this would be to name a retired athlete, so I suppose someone like David Beckham. He is a style icon, a nice bloke, and actually helped pave the way to P1 Management becoming a reality.

The post Pro Athletes Are the New Models: How Sports Stars Are Taking Over appeared first on Vogue.

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Sports News in Brief: Entire Ruby Tuesday Waitstaff Just Trying To Ignore Table Holding Fantasy Football Draft

SUFFOLK, VA—Hoping to have as little contact as possible with the large group of college-aged men until they left the restaurant, every member of the waitstaff at a local Ruby Tuesday admitted Friday that they were actively avoiding a large table conducting their fantasy football draft. “I got their food and drink orders all in one swoop and then booked it back to the kitchen before they could ask for anything else—as soon as I drop off these buffalo wings, I’m staying away from them at all costs,” said server Heather Lipscomb, adding that she brought two extra pitchers of beer for the 10 men—several of whom were wearing NFL jerseys—in the hopes that they wouldn’t need anything else for the rest of the night. “One of them kept waving at me as I was bringing some entrées over to another table in my …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Jason Witten Can’t Believe He Stuck Rooming With Jerry Jones During Training Camp Again

OXNARD, CA—Saying that he is counting down the days until the offseason practices are over, Dallas Cowboys tight end Jason Witten told reporters Thursday that he can’t believe he was once again stuck sharing a hotel room with owner Jerry Jones during training camp. “Goddammit, this is the fifth straight year they’ve paired us together,” said Witten, explaining that he has come to dread returning to his room each afternoon to find Jones sitting on his bed drinking bottles of Michelob Ultra and watching television at its maximum volume. “He never picks up any of his dirty clothes or trash—Christ, just look at all these copies of Maxim around the room. Plus, when I’m trying to go to sleep at night, all he wants to do is talk about that day’s practice and what the team should be working on before the season starts …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Redskins Maintain They Were Legally Granted Right To Name By 1807 Treaty Of Blackwater Creek

WASHINGTON—Responding to widespread criticism from an increasing majority of Americans who find the team’s moniker offensive, Washington Redskins officials announced Wednesday that they were legally granted the right to use the name by the 1807 Treaty of Blackwater Creek. “What critics fail to understand is that the Redskins name was originally approved by Native American tribes in an effort to make peace with early settlers,” said franchise owner Daniel Snyder, explaining that the 19th-century Iroquois gave their blessing to use the Redskins logo in exchange for bolts of cloth, copper kettles, and various food supplies. “Our team’s identity is not only a source of pride for our players, coaches, and fans, but also symbolizes a promise we made over two centuries ago at Fort Elmsley. To abandon it now would simply dishonor all the distinguished Native American elders who came together at Blackwater Creek and helped forge …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Hazed NFL Rookie Forced To Pay For Rest Of Team’s Child Support

CINCINNATI—Complaining that his teammates had taken their rookie hazing rituals too far, Bengals first-year linebacker Adam Rothwell revealed to reporters Thursday that he was recently forced to pay for the rest of his team’s child support. “We’re all out having a good time, and then all of a sudden I noticed everyone was gone, and I was left with all these court-ordered child support payments to take care of,” said Rothwell, adding that, including the three months of back child support that several teammates threw in at the last minute, he was on the hook for nearly $ 150,000. “I get that it’s a tradition and all, but some of those guys really went overboard. I mean, this is practically my whole signing bonus.” Reached for comment, an anonymous Bengals player claimed that Rothwell’s hazing was “nothing compared to the old days,” when rookies were …

The Onion

Fox Sports to Stream First Game of German Soccer League on YouTube

Kicking off its ambitious, global roll-out of the Bundesliga, Fox is letting people watch Friday’s opening match for free online.

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Sports News in Brief: Study: Human Reaction Time Now Best Measured By How Long It Takes To Pause ESPN Video Player

STANFORD, CA— Providing new insight into the inner workings of the central nervous system, a study published Friday by researchers at Stanford University revealed that human reaction time is now most accurately measured by the speed at which a person is able to pause a video on “The data clearly indicates that one’s ability to respond to sensory stimuli is best represented by the number of milliseconds that pass between seeing the video player load at the top of an ESPN article, hovering the cursor over it to reveal the control bar, and then hitting the pause button,” said Stanford neurologist Dana Frankel, adding that upon processing the audiovisual prompt, the brain will immediately begin firing neurons that signal the fingers to stop the video before sounds of a pre-roll commercial begin playing. “We’ve also found that we are able to actually improve upon this reflex …

The Onion

Willow Smith, 14, Describes Her Vision of a Perfect World and Sports Chic Looks in i-D Magazine—See Photos!

Willow Smith wants the world to be “one big tribe.”

The 14-year-old “Whip My Hair” singer and daughter of actors Will Smith, 46, and Jada Pinkett Smith, 43, talked…

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Sports News in Brief: Every Comment On ‘Immaculate Reception’ YouTube Video Clearly From Franco Harris

PITTSBURGH—Noting that the dozens of rambling, overly excited posts date all the way back to when the clip was first uploaded in early 2011, sources confirmed Thursday that every comment below a YouTube video of the famed 1972 “Immaculate Reception” football play was clearly written by Pittsburgh Steelers Hall of Fame running back Franco Harris. “Hands down THE best play in NFL history,” read a post left at 3:45 a.m. by YouTube user FHarris32, whose avatar appears to be a recent photo of Harris wearing his four Super Bowl rings on both hands. “This is what started the Steel Curtain dynasty and helped create one of the greatest teams of all-time. I still can’t believe I caught the ball like that after it was knocked down. Go Steelers!!!!” At press time, a long, largely incoherent rant disputing the “bullshit catch” had been posted by a YouTube …

The Onion

Kids’ Choice Sports Awards: Stars Get Slimed

It was gold slime for Derek Jeter, but it was all about the kids at Nickelodeon’s 2015 Kids’ Choice Awards!

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Sports News: 55-Year-Old Guy Dominating YMCA Pickup Basketball Game

CINCINNATI—Surprising many with his impeccable fundamentals and intense style of play, sources at the Elm Street YMCA confirmed Thursday that a 55-year-old man is absolutely dominating the competition at the gym’s evening pickup basketball game.

The partially graying, tank-top–clad man—who was overheard introducing himself as “Ken” to several other players at the beginning of the game—has reportedly been utterly unstoppable on both ends of the floor, carving up the opposing team with a diverse arsenal of pump fakes, post moves, and well-timed backdoor passes.

“He’s gotta be at least 15 years older than anyone else here, but he’s just blowing through people with ease,” said opposing player Evan Harris, 26, adding that the man has been confidently calling for the ball, setting screens, and directing his teammates’ positioning on defense. “He crashes the boards like a madman, he hustles down the court for …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: No One Seems To Know Guy Leaning Against Batting Cages Giving Hitting Advice

MADISON, WI—Saying that he is constantly offering words of encouragement and various pointers on maintaining a proper stance, sources confirmed Tuesday that no one at Damen’s Sports Complex appears to know a middle-aged man leaning against the batting cages giving people hitting advice. “At first, I thought the kid in the cage was his son, but he left a while ago and this guy is still standing there telling people to choke up on the bat and step into the ball more,” said local 24-year-old Anthony Wilson, adding that the stranger has enthusiastically clapped his hands and shouted “There you go, nice cut!” whenever a batter has made good contact with the ball. “Whoever he is, he definitely doesn’t work here, but he doesn’t seem to be waiting in line to bat either. He kept telling me to rotate my hips more when I swing and …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: ‘SportsCenter’ Co-Anchors Clearly Dating

BRISTOL, CT—Saying that the pair could barely take their eyes off one another throughout the hour-long sports news program, ESPN viewers told reporters Friday that it is increasingly clear SportsCenter anchors John Anderson and Matt Barrie are currently dating. “Based on the way they keep smiling at each other, it’s pretty obvious something’s going on there,” said Athens, GA resident Paul Nevins, 37, adding that the hosts were openly flirting with each other throughout the “Top 10 Plays” countdown, with Barrie at one point mentioning how cute Anderson looked in his suit today. “They must have taken a trip to Florida together, because they couldn’t stop bringing up some weekend getaway during a segment on the Marlins. Then when Anderson threw to Barrie before the next story, I swear I heard him say, ‘Thanks, honey.’ I’m pretty sure they’re playing footsie underneath that SportsCenter …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Stadium’s Pathetic Home Run Animation Doesn’t Even Show Ball Screaming While Leaving Earth

CLEVELAND—Calling it a complete and utter failure not worthy of Major League Baseball, sources at Progressive Field confirmed Monday that the stadium’s pathetic home run animation doesn’t even show a baseball screaming as it leaves Earth and flies into outer space. “You don’t get to see the ball’s cover fly off while it rockets out of the atmosphere and becomes a distant twinkle in space—are you kidding me?” said spectator Jake Vaughn, 37, adding that the pitiful excuse for a scoreboard graphic simply shows a large, slowly rotating baseball imprinted with the Cleveland Indians logo as the phrase “Home Run!” appears surrounded by exploding fireworks. “First of all, the ball doesn’t even have eyes or a mouth, but it wouldn’t even matter unless it was terrified and screaming next to a speech bubble that says ‘So long!’ or ‘It’s outta here …

The Onion

Sarah Hyland Sports Sexy, Plunging Black Gown to the 2015 MuchMusic Video Awards, Packs on PDA With Boyfriend Dominic Sherwood

Sarah Hyland, Dominic Sherwood, 2015 MuchMusic Video AwardsSarah Hyland’s 2015 MuchMusic Video Awards look can be summed up in, well, a word: Wowzah.

The Modern Family star took to the red carpet in a plunging black gown featuring a sexy…

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Sports News in Brief: Bubba Watson Horrified To Learn Two-Thirds Of Earth Covered In Water Hazards

UNIVERSITY PLACE, WA—Utterly overwhelmed by the thought of the planet’s surface containing such an unfathomable amount of the natural course obstacles, pro golfer Bubba Watson expressed both shock and fear Friday upon learning that approximately two-thirds of Earth is covered in water hazards. “It’s actually disturbing to think about water hazards making up over 70 percent of the world,” a wide-eyed Watson told reporters, noting with visible anxiety that the Pacific Ocean alone is over 60 million square miles of water hazard. “Think about it—you can look out from the edge of the rough and see nothing but a huge water hazard for thousands and thousands of miles. And some of the water hazards are so deep that no golf balls have ever even sunk all the way to the bottom. God, it’s just staggering.” Sources later confirmed that Watson was equally stunned after finding …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Younger Vikings Players Picking Adrian Peterson’s Brain For Parenting Tips

EDEN PRAIRIE, MN—Hoping to gain some insight from his incredible wealth of knowledge and experience, younger Minnesota Vikings players told reporters Friday that they have been picking running back Adrian Peterson’s brain during minicamp for helpful parenting advice. “My 4-year-old has been throwing a ton of tantrums lately, so naturally I sought out Adrian to see how he handles these situations with his own kids,” said wide receiver Adam Thielen, adding that he hoped to get the six-time Pro Bowler’s perspective on how to quickly and effectively discipline his children to prevent their bad behavior from getting out of hand. “Sometimes when I tell her to clear her plate, she’ll just outright ignore me, and getting her ready for bed is always such a struggle every single night. But Adrian is the go-to guy on the team for all this stuff, so I’m sure he …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Patriots Horrified After New Super Bowl Rings Cause Fingers To Shrivel Up, Turn Black

CHESTNUT HILL, MA—Moments after receiving their Super Bowl XLIX championship rings at team owner Robert Kraft’s home earlier this week, sources confirmed that New England Patriots players and coaches were horrified to find that the rings caused their fingers to instantly shrivel up and turn black. “Oh my God!” a horrified Julian Edelman screamed moments after slipping on the diamond-encrusted band, which immediately turned his ring finger into a shrunken, dried husk of charcoal flesh as spider-like tendrils of black rot rapidly spread up the wide receiver’s arm. “It’s burning me! It’s so hot! Wait, it’s—it’s not coming off! Oh, God, it’s not coming off! Help! Please help me!” At press time, as his players shrieked and clutched at their ashen, mutating arms, head coach Bill Belichick donned all four of his Super Bowl rings and could be observed cackling madly …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Sexist Pig Has No Idea When Team USA Playing Nigeria

NORTHFORD, CT—Revealing just how old-fashioned and small-minded he truly is, local sexist pig Jonathan Scott admitted Monday he has no idea what time the U.S. women’s soccer team plays Nigeria tomorrow night, sources reported. “Is the game on at 4 or 8?” said the misogynistic prick, who clearly believes that women are inferior athletes to men and therefore do not deserve an opportunity to participate in major athletic competitions such as the Women’s World Cup. “It’s on Fox, right? Not Fox Sports 1?” The disgusting woman-hater then reportedly questioned whether Team USA’s offense could get its act together in time for the knockout rounds.

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: FIFA Advises Female Players Unhappy With Turf To Spend More Time In Midair

ZURICH—Following widespread complaints that teams in the Women’s World Cup have been forced to play on synthetic fields, officials from FIFA held a press conference Thursday advising players unhappy with the turf to spend more time in midair. “In light of recent concerns, we are encouraging all players unsatisfied with the current field conditions to remain suspended in the air for as long as possible during matches,” said FIFA secretary general Jerome Valcke, adding that players can minimize the higher risk of injury associated with artificial turf by keeping their bodies at least six inches above the rubber-based field during jumping headers or scissor kicks. “Anyone worried about severe bruising or painful skin abrasions should consider continuously leaping throughout all 90 minutes of a game in order to avoid too much direct contact with the playing surface. And while the turf does reach temperatures of 120 degrees Fahrenheit …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: Tampa Bay Lightning Maintain Home Advantage By Restricting Admission To Fans Weighing 300 Pounds Or Less

TAMPA, FL—In an effort to limit the number of opposing Chicago Blackhawks fans attending Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Finals, officials from the Tampa Bay Lightning announced Friday that Amalie Arena will be restricting admission exclusively to patrons who weigh 300 pounds or less. “With the goal of maintaining a fully supportive crowd and a distinct home-ice advantage for the Lightning, we have decided to prevent the attendance of any individual medically classified as obese,” arena general manager Darryl Benge told reporters, noting that his staff has been explicitly instructed to bar the entrance of men and women wearing hockey jerseys that are size XXXL or larger. “We’re just doing everything we can to create a positive playoff atmosphere that gives our team the best chance to win, which means taking steps to ensure that our players aren’t bombarded with husky, constrained boos in between belabored …

The Onion

Sports News in Brief: NBA Players Association Calls For Increased Referee Presence In High-Foul Areas

NEW YORK—Noting that the rampant problem has devastated rosters across the league, representatives from the National Basketball Players Association demanded an increased referee presence in high-foul areas, sources confirmed Friday. “Something has to be done to crack down on all the foul-ridden sections of the court, and the only solution is having more referees out there to combat this issue head-on,” said NBPA executive director Michele Roberts, adding that the league must immediately position additional officials in the low post area, which has become a hotspot for personal, technical, and flagrant fouls. “We can’t let this situation get any worse than it already is. We’ve seen too many instances of power forwards and shooting guards getting hacked out there, and there are certain parts of the paint where players are too scared to even drive. It’s absolutely unacceptable.” Roberts added that the NBA needs to implement …

The Onion

EA Sports Launches “Madden NFL” Spotify Channel Featuring Songs By OutKast, The Roots, Killer Mike & More

(AllHipHop News) EA Sports is bringing its EA Trax soundtrack back to the Madden NFL franchise. Songs from both established and breaking artists from multiple genres will be included in the official music for the NFL Players Association sanctioned video game.

The music artists chosen for the latest edition of the Madden soundtrack will be revealed later this summer, but EA Sports has announced a new partnership with Spotify. The streaming site is hosting the Madden NFL channel. Users can listen to past EA Trax tunes by OutKast, The Roots, Killer Mike, Nappy Roots, and others.

“Our Madden NFL soundtracks have changed the cultures of both gaming and music,” said Steve Schnur, Worldwide Executive of Music and Marketing for EA. “They’ve given unparalleled exposure to new artists, and brought platinum acts to all-new levels. EA Trax is proud to be delivering a new soundtrack complete with national announcement events, and we look forward to once again moving music forward for millions of gamers and fans.”

GameStop and Live Nation are offering a Madden NFL 16 pre-order exclusive. Early purchasers will receive $ 15 worth of Live Nation Concert Cash which can be used toward tickets for select Live Nation concerts in the U.S. or artist merchandise from the Musictoday online store. The GameStop exclusive is granted in addition to the $ 15 of Madden Ultimate Team content players will already receive for pre-ordering the game.

Madden NFL 16 is scheduled for release on August 25. New York Giants Pro Bowl wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr was voted by the fans to be this year’s cover athlete.

Watch the Madden NFL 16 official first look trailer below.

Filed under: News Tagged: EA Sports, Killer Mike, live nation, Madden NFL, Outkast, Spotify, The Roots

Sports News in Brief: FIFA Assures Fans Investigation Won’t Affect 2022 Qatar Slush Fund

ZURICH—Stressing that soccer’s international governing body will continue to conduct business as usual in the face of high-profile fraud charges, FIFA officials assured the public Friday that the ongoing U.S. Department of Justice investigation will in no way affect the 2022 Qatar slush fund. “While our organization takes these allegations very seriously, we can guarantee with total confidence that the charges will not hinder or restrict the 2022 slush fund in Qatar,” said FIFA president Sepp Blatter, adding that the unreported personal expenditures and under-the-table government kickbacks will take place at multiple venues throughout the Middle Eastern country as scheduled. “Regardless of this ongoing probe, our officials are committed to accepting bribes in exchange for FIFA media and marketing rights, redirecting construction funds to personal expense accounts, and offering lavish gifts to Qatari political ministers in order to sidestep government regulations exactly as originally planned. These accusations …

The Onion

Jim Breuer: Sports & Comedy Intersect for Stand-Up Guy

Everyone knows that even the most talented athlete has put in long hours of practice and developed a mental toughness second to none. To prepare for competition, athletes spend exorbitant amounts of time on the practice field or in the weight room, just as their coaches do in the film room, looking for clues on how to perfect their offense or counter a defensive scheme. No matter how much talent a professional coach has on his roster or a player has in his God-given gene pool, there’s nothing that compares to preparation through practice, even if the ticket-buying public thinks they can just roll out the balls and play.

Now picture the life of a stand-up comic.

“Some people think what I do is … ‘Oh, yeah, just show up and be funny,'” said comedian Jim Breuer, one of Comedy Central’s 100 Greatest Stand-Ups of All-Time, as he approached the May 29th debut of his “Comic Frenzy” one-hour special on EPIX (check local listings). “Comedy is on my mind 24/7,” he noted when asked of the comparisons between a stand-up comic and a pro ballplayer. “I’m always thinking, always creating and always developing in my head, and I need to a couple months ahead.

“I have this new special coming out now (on EPIX), but I’m plotting and planning for the future and trying to be ahead of the game,” continued Breuer, a Long Island native and ardent New York Mets fan. “You’re a writer, and you have to come up with new material to keep your audience. You want your new stuff to be even funnier. Otherwise, you’re dead. You’re dead in the water.

“It’s just like sports, really. Great, you hit the game-winning home run yesterday but today, you if blew the game with an error on what could’ve been an easy, game-ending double-play? Or, forget it if you’re a pitcher and you just got shelled in today’s game.”

So what’s is like to get shelled as a comedian?

“Thank God, at the stage I’m at now, (I know) I’ll rebound from this. And if I ever get that shelling, it might be from a private, bizarre gig that I probably shouldn’t be doing in the first place, like a small private party with eight people attending in somebody’s living room.”

Popular comedian Jim Breuer doesn’t have to worry about that scary scenario any more. After some 20 years in the business, he can command a stand-up comedy stage much like his favorite New York Mets pitcher, Dwight Gooden, commanded the mound in 1986.

“Dwight Gooden was one of the best pitchers I’ve ever seen in my life,” recalled Breuer, who attended many games at Shea Stadium from 1984 to the Mets’ world championship season of 1986. That’s when Gooden was enjoying a span of about 50 starts when he went 37-5 with a 1.38 ERA and 412 strikeouts in 406 innings pitched.

“It was an EVENT! He’d show up, he sold out, and people came out just to watch him pitch. He was invincible, mowing people down. It was like watching a Mike Tyson fight (in his early days).”

While it’s fun to watch a game on TV, there’s nothing like attending the event in person. Breuer feels that live comedy supplies that same experience.

“What describes me best (and what portrays him at his best), is when you come see me live. Stand-up comedy is the best “a-game” that I put out there,” said Breuer, after being prompted for insight. “And the reason I feel this show is so good is that I did it 100 percent my way. I filmed it where I wanted to film it – on Long Island, in front of some of my hometown people. I hired the director I wanted to direct, and this is my personal project. I’m very excited about it.

“If someone wonders what I’m like, live, this (EPIX special) is a really great description.”

It’s a rare comedic star who becomes an overnight sensation. The more typical path to stardom is similar to the long road an athlete must travel, where hard work, perseverance and dedication to the craft are what make a star a star.

“It comes with experience and it comes with confidence, especially confidence,” Breuer paused to emphasize. “It comes with a drive and determination.

“I went out there in 2008, and here we are, seven years later, and it’s my third or fourth special. But technically I started my career in 1989, so I’ve been around a while, working TV. When you finally find your voice and how you want to use it? It took me quite a while to find that. I was always a huge comedy fan, and I watched it since I was little,” he said, remembering watching Johnny Carson as a youngster, as well as the likes of Laurel and Hardy or Abbott and Costello on Sunday mornings.

“I loved it all. George Carlin, Richard Pryor, Buddy Hackett and Don Rickles. I can remember Laugh In and Sonny & Cher. But Eddie Murphy? I went to see him at the Westbury Music Fair when I was about 17 or 18 years old and to see someone that young (Murphy was only 23 at the time), I could just taste it. He was the super-inspiration for me.”

The thrill of making people laugh the way Eddie Murphy could was the attraction to Breuer and drew him to a profession that, like professional sports, provides valuable entertainment value to the average fan.

“Music – Comedy – Sports, they all have healing power,” said Breuer. “They can heal a major part of you. They can be healers of pain or healers of (bad) memories. But they can create great memories…I think that’s why everyone relates to them.

“Sports, music and comedy, everyone needs them.”

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Sports Authority and Champion Launching Champion GEAR

While the ath-leisure trend continuing to pickup steam, Sports Authority has partnered with Champion Athleticwear to launch Champion GEAR performance-driven activewear.
As of Wednesday, the 462-unit chain will sell the women’s and men’s collection exclusively nationwide and via its e-commerce site. Sports Authority decided to bolster its more technical athletic apparel after 18 months of consumer-driven market research indicated that “people were looking for technical-driven, value-oriented performance clothing,” according to executive vice president and chief merchandising officer Stephen Binkley.
Champion GEAR tank tops, T-shirts, pants and shorts draw from four key components: Seamless, Compression, Quick-drying Champion Vapor Technology and Reflective. The latter is targeted at night-time runners and cyclists. The collection’s Millennial-friendly retail price range will run from $ 35 to $ 50. Having renovated stores in the Orlando market earlier this month, Sports Authority will unveil locations in Sacramento and Tempe May 30.
Along with an assortment of print and digital ads, as well as commercials, Champion GEAR will be spotlighted with in-store displays and through social media. Sports Authority and Champion will encourage fans to share photos and feedback with the #championgear hashtag. Binkley declined to comment about projected wholesale volume or the media buy, other than to say Champion GEAR’s pre-Father’s Day marketing will be

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Celebs & Sports Stars Salute Stephen Curry’s MVP Win [Photos]

Ladies and gentlemen,

Mr. Stephen Curry MVP requests a few minutes of your time.

The 27-year-old NBA star has definitely earned the right to it outside the countless highlights he amassed over the course of the current season. His MVP acceptance speech displayed the same classy demeanor he has on the court as he fought back tears thanking Jesus Christ, his wife, his parents, younger NBA bro Seth, and even the team’s head of security.

“I love playing basketball,” Curry admitted, after owning up to the nervousness of the moment. “There’s no doubt about it. It’s been something I’ve been doing since I was like…two? On Fisher-Price goals. From that beginning to be standing here in front of you today has been an incredible journey. A lot has gone into it; a lot of great people that I have met on the way have [every bit] of that trophy that I do.”

Curry’s popularity amongst the powers that be definitely reflect his popularity off the court as well. He accepted the Maurice Podoloff Trophy after receiving 100 out of 130 first-place votes and earning 1,198 points, beating out James Harden (936 points), LeBron James (552 points), and Russell Westbrook (352 points).

“This hasn’t sunk in at all, he continued. “I’m on cloud nine.”

As was much of the pop culture world connected to sports. Scroll through the gallery below to see top figures tip their hats to #30. He’s a pretty popular guy.


Photos: Twitter, NBA TV

The post Celebs & Sports Stars Salute Stephen Curry’s MVP Win [Photos] appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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Michael Strahan — Body-to-Body Contact Sports with New Girlfriend

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Sportsgraphic: Greatest Undefeated Seasons In Sports History

With the University of Kentucky men’s basketball team just four games away from completing a perfect 40-0 season, Onion Sports takes a look back at the greatest undefeated runs in sports history. 1971 Nebraska Cornhuskers: The Univers…

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Sportsgraphic: Greatest Undefeated Seasons In Sports History

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‘Millionaire Matchmaker’ Hottie Candace Smith — My Ass Loves Ball Sports … That’s No Stretch!

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French sports stars die in heli crash

French sports stars are among ten people killed in a crash involving two helicopters in Argentina. Paul Chapman reports

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Hannah Davis Lands Cover of 2015 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue—and It’s the Most Revealing Cover Yet!

Sports Illustrated, Hannah Davis, TwitterGuys, please control yourselves. Jaws up. Wipe that drool off your chin. We know this is super hot, but we’re all adults here.

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‘I’m A Boxer’ Video Is A Powerful Response To Sexism In Sports

“Don’t call me a female boxer. I’m a boxer.”

These are the words spoken by a young athlete, who, like many girls, wants an equal playing field when it comes to sports.

In a powerful commercial made by Everlast, “I’m a Boxer” addresses the sexism faced by women in athletics every day. “I imagine a world where it doesn’t matter if you’re a boy or girl,” says the young girl in a voiceover. “What matters is how well you play.”

“There seems to be a trend happening where women’s career titles are constantly being genderized,” Claire Edmondson, who directed the commericial, wrote in an email to The Huffington Post. “For instance, I’m constantly referred to as a ‘female director’ instead of a ‘director’ and I wanted to address that. I also wanted to make something positive for young girls to see.”

Edmondson explained the message she wants these girls to take away from the video.

“I’m hoping that they feel encouraged to stick with whatever they are doing, even if it feels a little hopeless at time and for them to know they do matter.”

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Shemar Moore — My Girlfriend’s The Hottest Woman In Sports

What do Serena Williams, Maria Sharapova and Danica Patrick have in common? Second place … so says “Criminal Minds” star Shemar Moore who says he’s got a new girlfriend who’s the #1 HOTTEST chick in pro sports.So who’s the mystery woman who was…


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15 Of The Biggest LGBT Sports Moments Of 2014

2014 was a watershed year for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender athletes.

From Michael Sam’s NFL draft and kiss with his boyfriend on national television to the international controversy surrounding the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics, visibility surrounding queer athletes in the mainstream reached a level unprecedented.

Cultural stigma surrounding queer people in the sports world is slowly unraveling, and attitudes and perceptions of what it means to be an LGBT athlete are evolving alongside the folding of LGBT people into mainstream society.

As we approach the end of 2014, let’s look back at some of the biggest LGBT moments in the sports world over the past 12 months.

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Why Michael Sam Says He Needed Sports to Survive | Oprah Prime | Oprah Winfrey Network

Michael Sam, the first openly gay player drafted into the National Football League, grew up a self-proclaimed “mama’s boy” in the small town of Hitchcock, Texas. Michael found an outlet in sports, an activity his mother, a Jehovah’s Witness, didn’t approve of because she believed it conflicted with the religion. “Becoming a teenager, I needed sports,” he says. “I knew I wanted to make something of myself. I knew sports taught me, and my coaches taught me, the discipline that I have today. I needed it.”

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Winfrey provides leadership in programming and attracts superstar talent to join her in primetime, building a global community of like-minded viewers and leading that community to connect on social media and beyond. OWN is a singular destination on cable. Depth with edge. Heart. Star power. Connection. And endless possibilities.

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Geox to Outfit Italian Winter Sports Federation

Geox will provide the shoes to the 400 athletes of the Italian Winter Sports Federation for the 2014-2015 season.

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David Beckham Slimed At The Nickelodeon Kids Choice Sports Awards (VIDEO)

David Beckham received a lot more than a trophy at Nickelodeon’s inaugural Kids Choice Sports Award. The former Manchester United and LA Galaxy soccer star took the stage with sons Romeo and Cruz to collect the event’s Legend Lifetime Achievement Award, and got a slime-filled shower in the process. Nickelodeon’s been sliming celebrities since the ’80s (do you feel old yet?), so Becks is joining an illustrious list.

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Gia DiMarco and Emma Haize get into a fight in the girls locker room. Their perverted coach punishes them with kinky anal sex acts starting with spanking, ass licking and ass fucking. Then he continues the punishment with humiliating object insertions of sports equipment like a tennis racket, baseball bat and bowling pin! This also includes a bonus ass fetish segment.

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